Friend or Foe?

There is a difference between friends and acquaintances. Aways use wisdom before calling someone your friend.

A friend looks out for your best interest, helps maintain your closeness with the Lord and encourages time with your spouse and children. They love at all times and encourage you during times of lowliness.  They love you because they took the time to get to know you. They allow you to see them when they are vulnerable and don’t judge you when you are in the same boat. They are truthful and loyal. They walk through all seasons of life with you. They correct in love and in private when we hold wrong thinking or wrong behavior. They follow healthy boundaries and know the order they fit into in your life. ( God first, then spouse/children, then all others.) They don’t hold the need to be the center of attention because they don’t hold selfish tendencies.

An acquaintance is someone who knows very little about you and only allows you to see in them what they want you to see. They look out for themselves before looking out for others. They expect you to compromise your standard of living to fit theirs.  They expect you to participate in activities they enjoy such as socializing in manners that go against God’s standards set for us to follow. They have no problem removing you from your obligations such as your spouse or family. They love things about you but don’t love you because they are too busy taking from you instead of making time to get to know you. They seek to gain something from you where their life hold voids. It may be that they are lonely, depressed or bored but they seek something you keep giving and most of it comes down to the time you offer them. They gain approval from you that others don’t hold for them. They keep coming back to have their needs met but hold no intention of meeting your unmet needs. They are in your life for a short season not longterm. Their loyalty belongs to self, not to you.

Not everyone is a blessing. Some people appear to be at first but not everything is as it appears to be. Those that appear to be a blessing eventually will expose themselves and your blinders will be ripped from you as quick as the air in your chest was. You will be floored by what they expose all on their own doing. This means some people we call a blessing are simply a trap meant to lure us away from the Lord. If someone is replacing the time God intended for your marriage and family, they are not a blessing. They are a distraction intended to lead you down a path of sin and destructive behavior. If they are condoning your wrong thinking or behavior, you need to start questioning what you gain by keeping their company.  You gain something that is why they are still around, but what you gain doesn’t outweigh what you are giving up.

Blessings,

Robin Worgull

Rise Up Soldier!

Get up soldier, it’s time to dress in your armor. You have been trained your entire life for this moment. Those times you were broken down through life were necessary in order to build you up strong for what you are about to encounter. You are strong and more capable than you can imagine. God sends His strongest soldiers into the worst battles. He saw fit to send you into this one. You need to rid yourself of any fear held that has you bowing to defeat because the spirit of fear is not of God.  2 Timothy 1:7  ” For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”

There is a battle going on in the unseen realm where dark angels and angels of light both are trying to conquer control over us right now. Ephesians 6:12 reminds us we don’t battle against flesh and blood but against principalities in high places. We can’t see the battle taking place but all those assaults aimed at your mind is your reminder that dark angels intend to wear you down emotionally so physically you bow to defeat. Remember all through scriptures God reminds us He will fight our battles for us, all we have to do is stand on faith. Don’t be one of the weak individuals weeded out. This is a battle to see who the strongest soldiers are.

Place your military mentality cap on and wear it with boldness for the commander of truth. This means you don’t get your feelings hurt every time the voices of evil try convincing you that you don’t measure up. You are a strong warrior equipped with the knowledge of how to defeat the enemy. Act like it by being fearless! Now is the time you must have thick skin because not everyone will like you or stand with you. Soldiers don’t worry about who likes them or who approves of their job. They take the orders given and do the job knowing it’s business not personal. They answer to the commanding officer.

We answer to the commander of truth. We are given orders to stand on faith and to be suited up for the battles coming our way. God saw you as one of the strongest soldiers otherwise you would not be facing the upset coming at you. Now is the time to quit saying you have faith and actually prove it. Step out courageously, holding the truth of who you are and show the enemy who is in control of you. You can even remind the enemy his fate is already sealed .

Rise up soldier for the battle is at hand. If you get knocked down, brush the dust off, get back up and stand on truth. The enemy coming at you seeks complete darkness. He aims to take you out because you hold the light. Don’t let darkness dim your light. You were given power, love and a sound mind to complete the mission assigned to you.

Blessing,

Robin Worgull

The Mask Of Deceit:

Many of us hold people in our lives that routinely wear the mask of deceit. This mask is meant to disguise the true intentions of the person wearing it. It’s simply a trap many of us fall into when it could have easily been avoided. Those of us who encounter this deception tend to be caught off guard due to who was wearing the mask. We don’t expect to be misled by our spouse, family member or friends. No, these are the people who should be uplifting us with their words not tearing us down with lies that are meant to convince us that we are the cause of their upset. The truth is people who hold dishonest behavior point the finger of blame at others before looking inwardly at themselves first. If they were to stop and take a good look at themselves they would be able to determine why they feel the need to disguise their true character.

Take the secretive person for instance. They tend to want to be seen as better than who they have become. They must be hiding something they feel others might judge them on. They often feel if people knew them for how they truly are, they might not have as many people around, thinking as highly as they do if they knew the whole truth. What they do instead, is only let people see them as they want to be seen. They do this by giving partial truth and withholding the rest of the truth needed for the people around them to decide for themselves if this is the company they want to keep. They try to sell themselves as genuine but everything about their actions screams, fraudulent. Their words and actions contradict each other and mislead anyone who crosses their paths. Many of them hold addictions they fear for those around them to know about. It may be that they are addicted to alcohol, porn or something less destructive such as seeking the attention of others. Seeking the attention of others can be destructive if the method they use draws the wrong attention. The way they position themselves in life is not always the truth of who they truly are.

People who wear the mask of deceit often carry emotional baggage.  They often fail to see that what they used temporarily to self medicate or get through a tough hardship, quickly turned into a long term problem. Sometimes no substance is used but rather a person who makes them feel alive is used instead. In order to not expose themselves, they must become more secretive. The more secretive they become the more anger they hold. They use anger to defend themselves against those they feel threatened by. The more anger held the more abuse verbally or physically is issued towards unsuspecting people. Each turn they make is double-crossing someone else. They are trying to camouflage their emotional pain but in the process are issuing it onto those they claim to love or care for.

Those people who can’t see the mask of deceit for what it is, are the people worn down from such harsh treatment endured. I’m talking about the ones who have been lied to for so long and wrongly accused of things they didn’t do.  The ones who have been called every name in the book and questioned why they are not lovable or are rejected by those claiming to love them. Those who analyze every word spoken to them and self evaluate themselves to the end degree and still hold no resolution. Those who hold such a deep void within and cried enough tears to last them a lifetime. Those robbed of time invested and peace ripped right out of them. Left hopeless and mourning over things done to them. Until… They called the truth of their situation.

Here’s how to call the truth of every situation you may encounter: Who, what, when, where and why are the five questions you must ask.

  1.  Who was speaking to me?  Was it the spirit of truth or the spirit of evil?  1 John 4:1 reminds us to test the spirits. Keep in mind we are sent a message every day and sometimes those messages are spoken through people our hearts are invested in. Just because it looks and sounds like a trusted individual such as our spouse, family member or friend doesn’t mean they were the ones who sent the message. They were simply the vessel used.
  2. What did I take away from this message? Remember you have to discern if you will believe or reject what was spoken to you or done to you.
  3. When did this take place?  It doesn’t matter when what matters is how you react. This means, don’t play into the hand the devil has dealt you. It’s simply a trap.
  4. Where was I in my spiritual walk when I took offense to words spoke to me? If you are not positioned under God and aligning yourself to his will for you then you are walking on an open battlefield with no battle gear on for protection. This means you are exposed to the elements around you.
  5. Why were these things said or done to me? Again, we take away a message in every conversation or action done against us. Ask yourself was this done against me or against God? Was the conversation uplifting or did it tear you down?

When you start asking these five questions is when you start pulling the truth of why the mask of deceit worn by trusted individuals bothers you as much as it does. Remember, they don’t speak the truth so don’t expect to hear it. They don’t hold good intentions so don’t expect right behavior. They live under the standards they set for themselves not under the standards God expects us to live by.  You can’t understand something you don’t subscribe too which is the dark spirit influencing the person wearing the mask of deceit. It doesn’t matter how much your heart has invested in the person who deceives you, your love is not enough to change their heart. Only God can change the hearts of people. Jeremiah 17:9 reminds us the heart is deceiving. This means don’t believe everything you feel because that mistake will have you using your emotions as your logic. When you begin calling the truth of each and every situation, is when you begin exposing the one hiding behind the mask of deceit. They can only hide as long as you allow them too.

Blessings,

Robin Worgull

Do you allow your mind to wander?

So many of us have situational circumstances interfering with our quality of life. Things such as marital, health, financial or emotional issues that prevent us from truly living and cause us to feel as if we are merely existing. We become discouraged easily as we can’t see a solution to our problem. Our problem has gone on for so long, that we count it as normal when in all actuality it has made life feel abnormal. We feel a deep void but lack knowledge on what we can do to remove the void. We seek distractions looking for fulfillment but life has become dull and pointless to many of you reading. A situation encountered robbed you of joy and hope once held.  What was suppose to be and meant to be turned out entirely different than the anticipation held when it all began.

We tend to resolve our problems by looking for solutions. While looking for solutions is productive, sometimes our method of looking can be destructive.  If we have health issues we seek a doctor. Financial issues we seek other work or curb our spending. Both of these are healthy solutions, especially if we are in prayer and leaning on the Lord to resolve our hardships.

Most of our marital and emotional issues begin with a lack of understanding. Anytime our understanding is weakened,  our over analyzing is strengthened. We begin analyzing every word spoken, the tone used, body language and recall details involved such as smells, location, touch etc. This method of problem-solving is destructive. Why? Maybe because we are leaning on our own understanding of the situation itself.  If we are going to go as far as analyzing all these things, it is because of a certain situation we took personally and experienced heartache in the process. Anytime our heart is involved, emotions run strong. Our emotions can mislead us into thinking things that are not accurate which is why this method is destructive when problem-solving.

The Bible tells us to hold our thoughts captive for a time in order to discern where those thoughts came from. When we fail to hold our thoughts captive,  we become held captive by the very thoughts we think upon. Proverbs 23:7 reminds us that the way we think is how we become.

Most of us only think at the level of our own understanding. Our understanding may often be influenced by how we feel at the moment. If our emotions are running high then our understanding may be running low. My encouragement is to call the truth of every situation you encounter. The way we feel is not always the truth of a situation we are in.

To try finding a solution to our problem while under emotional distress, has us missing any logic needed to call the truth of how things truly are. Our emotions cloud our logic. When logic is clouded we tend to lean on our own understanding. Our understanding is the cause of our initial emotional distress, which is the primary cause of our marital issues. We must remove emotions in order to pull logic. I know, it sounds impossible but it is not. Hard? Yes, because we must hold discipline in our thoughts in order to hold discipline in our tongues. The words that come out of our mouths to our spouses, began in our thoughts…

Our thoughts determine if we are truly living or merely existing. See, negative thoughts lead to negative decisions, which are steps through this journey we call life. Our thoughts often throw us off course.

Blessings,

Robin Worgull

 

How to be the right-minded woman series#2

It is extremely difficult to keep our minds on things above when our sole focus is on everything going on around us.  Things such as the demands associated with being married and having children.

A huge mistake a woman can make is allowing the demands to overtake her. We are meant to manage our homes while remembering everything we do,  is to do be done to the glory of God.  ( 1 Corinthians 10:31 ) So, to be overtaken by demands is our first indication we are trying to operate on our own strength or our own understanding, which ultimately throws us off emotionally. This causes us to feel frustrated or angry. Yet if we are caring for our family with the mindset of pleasing God,  then we would seek His will over trying to obtain our own will.

It is hard to downshift by handing over control when we have demanded control for so long in our homes. We expect our homes to look a certain way, our kids to behave, expect alone time with our spouse and if rules are not followed, we become upset due to the control of the home being lost.

As a mother of four I use to pray that God would calm my kids, but the truth is,   He showed me I was the one in need of calming. See, the mistake I kept making was comparing my womanhood to the women around me. I saw their lives in order and my life in chaos. I saw organized homes, well-behaved kids, and then when I looked at my life I just didn’t see where I measured up.  It didn’t matter how hard I tried, my house always looked lived in while I continued to look tired. I couldn’t understand how these women had the energy to look flawless, have a clean home and still have well-behaved children. What were they doing that I wasn’t? How could I become that type of woman for my family?

When we look to the left then to the right and compare ourselves to others, we will never be happy with who we are as a person. We don’t need to try to be like others in order to hold what we think they have. We only know what they allow us to see. We don’t know what they had to go through to get to where they are. Keep in mind, sometimes the package looks perfect but the gift inside is broken…

In order to be a right-minded woman, we must not compare ourselves to others. God called us to be ourselves because He wants to use our unique ways for His glory. What we see as flaws He sees as potential. You were the perfect woman for your husband and the perfect woman to raise your children. No one else can do what you do for your family. Where you are right now is exactly where you are supposed to be.  What you do with the time God grants you on earth, is the difference between making an impact in your families life or defeating them before they are old enough to leave your home. It is our duty to be a helpmate to our husband and an example worth following to our children. According to Psalm 90:12, our days are numbered and we have no time to waste on trying to be someone other than who we were called to be.

Blessings,

Robin Worgull